Pacis

Both Wil and Anna are pacifier users. Wil's usage has decreased significantly over the last few months - he only uses one at bedtime - but there was a time when he had a paci any time he wasn't in public. Anna doesn't have quite the addiction Wil had, and I hope to avoid getting her hooked like he was. But my question these days is: where have all the pacis gone? I'd estimate that we've purchased at least 20 pacifiers - probably more like 30 - since Wil was born.

We moved to a new house when Wil was a year old, and I'd estimate that by then, we'd gone through about 8 little green and blue rubber mouth plugs, and we'd lost all but 2 or 3. I thought for sure that when we packed up we'd find a few hidden behind the sofa, under the bed, under the clothes washer, etc. Truth is, though, that we found zero. Absolutely no hidden pacis.

So now Anna is four and a half months old. We brought her home with a green paci, and I bought four others - two green, two pink. As of this writing, we are down to one green paci and one pink one. Anna doesn't even like the pink pacis, but somehow we've managed to lose one of them, as well as two green ones.

Where the heck are these things going? We're not losing them in the grocery store or when we're out running errands - we're losing them in our house. Neither of our pets is big enough to eat pacifiers, so I can't blame them. There was a time when Wil was amused by the process of throwing things into our big stainless steel trash can and letting the lid slam down. I'm sure we lost more than one to the landfill that way, but that phase is over - and still, we lose pacis.

I once heard a story of a remote control disappearing for years and being discovered when the dryer's lint trap stopped working, so the lint trap comes to mind. But neither Rob nor I would put pacis in there, and there's no way Wil can get up there. Could the cat be picking them up and putting them somewhere? Where? Not the lint trap - he can't open that. Not the litter box - I can guarantee that. There are no accessible heating vents in our home, and the cat isn't allowed outside. Maybe he's got a stash deep in a closet - he does have a knack for finding hidden spots, especially now that Wil's part of the family. But I have a hard time imagining Oscar being that industrious. Seems like way too much work for a 10-year-old cat.

Do they disintegrate? Could it be that we're somehow accidentally dropping an otherwise safe but caustic-to-pacifiers (pacicaustic?) liquid on them, and they simply evaporate?

Aliens?

A roving, toddling band of pacifier thieves? I must admit, I don't keep close tabs on our animal cracker supply, but it does dwindle quite quickly. Perhaps there's a gang of youngsters in our neighborhood who go around stealing pacis and snacks from unoccupied homes. If that's the case, then paci losses will decrease substantially when I start staying home with the kids.

Which, by the way, is in less than a week.